perfectly portioned bliss.....

i can't stand yogurt!  i really want to like it.  it seems like a convenient, easy food to consume.  it comes packaged in just the right amount (and most of the time the container is recyclable), the flavors sound yummy, you can get it with fruit or without, yogurt options are endless.  if you are a yogurt lover i can't imagine that you would ever get tired of eating it because there are just so many different types to eat.  i really wish that i liked it!

i am a girl who really likes routine.  commercials have put this idea of a routine with yogurt that i want to partake in.  you all know this scenario; young, slim trim figured gal in just her tank and skivvies.  she walks barefoot to the fridge and grabs her yogurt without a care in the world.  at this moment it is all about the yogurt.  for some reason she takes her yogurt to the conversation chair in her living room and plops down into it.  most of the time she puts both of her fantastically fit legs over the arm rest and crosses her ankles, then takes the lid off the yogurt, licks the lid, then dips her spoon into the perfectly portioned plastic cup and enjoys that first actual spoonful.  pure yogurt bliss!!

this is not how i "enjoy" my yogurt.  here is my scenario; i rush into work (either i am right on time or a minute late), grab a spoon out of the kitchen and head to my desk.  my desk is like sitting in a fish bowl, i have windows (floor to ceiling) on two sides of me.  i turn to my computer, peel back the lid (never lick it just toss into the garbage) and dip in my spoon.  i load my spoon with as much as it will hold and shove into my mouth, just swallowing.  i can eat my perfectly portioned cup in about 4-5 spoonfuls.  there is no enjoyment to be had, i choke it down, each swallow is followed by a cringing shiver.  mmmmm.....

the giant costco box i purchased is almost gone, i have one more of perfectly portioned cup of enjoyment to consume.  i still don't like and probably never will.  i will probably continue to torture myself and purchase this wretched stuff.  maybe i will try the tank, skivvies, kick my feet up on the chair method of eating my yogurt?  maybe it tastes better if you eat it this way?  hmmmm.....