beat back love...

i bought this album on impulse.  it was at the check out counter and i thought he was cute.  oh my word i am such a teenage girl.  i was really hoping there was a poster inside, but there wasn't.  probably a good thing that might be a little weird.  can you picture it?  i have a man over (which is a rare occasion), we decide to take things to the bedroom (the dinosaurs roamed the earth the last time i had a man in my bed) clothes start flying, he throws me down on the bed, raises his head for a breather and his gaze it met with that gorgeous face (not mine).  definitely a mood killer and the inevitable question, "uh who is that?"  "oh you know my dream man."  said in the most casual nonchalant way. 

here's the problem with displaying your dream man (physically anyway, i don't know anything else about him).  if i happen to have a man in my bedroom (side note for the men, i am really into you if you've made it that far) there is now a standard to live up to.  a standard plastered right above my bed, the first thing i see in the morning and the last thing i see at night.  this might be a little intimidating?  i can tell you if i were to enter a man's room and there was some luscious woman plastered to his wall, i would be comparing myself to her.  how do i measure up? 

anyway, i am completely off track.  the title of this post is beat back love which is track three from the album.  it is an upbeat song about two friends, a guy and gal, the guy is always there for the girl and she doesn't see him as anything besides a friend.  the words of this track are resonating and making me ask myself some questions.

i have a guy friend, i am not going to tell you who it is because i don't want to.  he is fantastic.  we do lots of fun things together and always have the best time, but our relationship has never been intimate.  he knows everything about me and still loves me.  he has seen at my absolute worse, deflated in a heap of sorrow.  he has also seen me at my very best, like a shiny star. 

funny thing we have talked about "dating" each other.  this came about because of some off the cuff remark i had made and basically challenged him.  we did go out on a real date.  i will admit that it felt different.  i am not sure if it was because we went into it with a different mind set or because it was really different, but it was really nice.  so what happened?

i freaked out.  i didn't want to jeopardize what we have.  i am sorry but adding the intimacy factor changes the relationship.  i couldn't handle the thought that if we didn't "work out" i would lose my friend.  i honestly cannot imagine my life without him in it.  so friends it is.

ladies do you have that gentleman friend that is always there for you?  gents do you have a lady friend that you wish would see you in a different light?  ladies and gents is there really a way to go from being platonic friends to intimate lovers for a lifetime?  if you had the opportunity would you do it?