Friday, July 19, 2013

craigslist ad...

i'm about to stick my nose into something i shouldn't.  i have absolutely NO first hand knowledge to know how i would deal with this situation, but that doesn't stop me from having an opinion.

craigslist ad:
free decorating supplies; live and dead flowers, balloons deflated and floating, beads of multiple colors, a banner, a sturdy white cross and a whole bunch of other crap. 
please remove as soon as possible, but i recommend collecting your cache in the cover of darkness. 
location: on the side of a curvy busy road, just look for the cross.
 
last year there was a fatal hit and run car accident outside my house. I have been amazed and astounded by the outpouring of love from this man's family, friends and possibly strangers.  the amount of flowers and balloons is incredible.  i hope when i leave this earth that i will be loved just as much.  however, i don't want my loved ones to spend the rest of their lives "decorating" the place that i passed.

i admit that this is a bit churlish, but i am done. 
DONE, i say. 

over the past year, every, i'm talking every, major holiday has been celebrated at the cross on the side of the road.  twelve carved pumpkins for Halloween, harvest colored flowers for thanksgiving, a decorated miniature tree for Christmas, heart balloons for valentines day, easter lilies for easter, mardi gras beads for mardi gras (is that even a real holiday?).  for the anniversary of the accident came a huge bouquet of balloons and an enormous "don't drink and drive" banner that was duct taped between two towering trees.  the most recent addition is birthday balloons, it must have been his birthday.

i'm kinda reacting like mr. nebbercracker from the movie monster house.  have you seen this movie?  he is a crotchety old man who is constantly harping at the kids across the street to get off my lawn!  i feel like him because i am tired of the traffic (people parked in my driveway or on the shoulder of the road) to pay their respects.  i am tired of all the crap that is on the side of the road, it is distracting and junky to look at.  to be honest i am tired of being reminded that a person was killed feet from my front door.  

like i said, i have no first hand knowledge of what i would do if my loved one died tragically in an accident.  maybe i would go back to the last place they were alive.  however i think that i would be more inclined to honor my loved one by going to a place that we enjoyed together.  i will give you an example; every year my dad takes a morning to go to a golf course to remember his dad.  sometimes he plays a round, sometimes he just walks the course, but every time he is there because it is something that brings back fond memories of his dad.  this is more my style.

to date there is still a mess of stuff on the side of the road.  it will probably remain there for years and i am just going to have to deal with it or move. 

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just the other day I told my buddy that if I am killed on the side of the road, please don't put up a cross for me.

Unknown said...

anon...i was prepared to get a lot of grief for this post, but maybe i'm not the only one who feels this way? thank you for sharing.

Anonymous said...

I would feel exactly like you do! Grave sites are the place for the decor ( of that) not where the accident happened. Just my two cents :-) Emily D

T.R. said...

Yeah, I think you are in the right...but you just can't voice it to the ones that matter.

Unknown said...

Emily...I am liking your two cents.

Unknown said...

T.R. this is part of what i don't understand. i get the need for tactfully saying what's on your mind, but why do we have to avoid certain topics, ideas, thoughts??