situations of misunderstandings...

misunderstandings are a part of every day life.  although we may think we are speaking clear as the waters that surround kuramathi island in the maldives, the person receiving the message may only see the murkiest bog you can think of.  isn't it odd how differently a single statement can be interpreted?   does it make you wonder where the actual breakdown occurs?

is it because the receiver already has an idea of what the speaker is going to say?  i think when we are wanting or expecting something from someone, we listen to their words trying to make what they are saying fit in to what we are wanting to hear.  for instance, lets say i like a guy, he tells me i'm pretty, my next thought is he wants to spend the rest of his life with me.  okay this may seem a little extreme, but stick with me it is easier to paint an extreme picture.  so he said i'm pretty who cares. he might think his mom is pretty, or the sunset is pretty, or his bird is pretty, it doesn't mean he wants anything more from them, just like he doesn't want anything more from me.  however, since i like him and he has just complimented me, i twist it all around and make something more of it.  i recognize how dumb this is, but i have to believe that we all do this to some extent.  listening to the words that are being spoken without having an agenda can be hard.

or maybe it is because the speaker used a word that could have multiple meanings?  i think the english language lends itself to multipurpose words.  meaning we can plug the exact same word into sentences that do not convey the same message, but somehow they work.  at the moment i cannot think of one of these multipurpose words.  go figure.

whatever the reason for the misunderstanding is of no consequence.  what happens after the misunderstanding has a greater impact.  do you stand your ground and defend your position to the death?  do you swallow your pride and drop the issue?  or maybe you just don't care.  i can honestly say that i bounce between all the scenarios.  when the name caller wanted to "talk ", i had no interest.  in my mind i had addressed my position, it wasn't heeded, so there was nothing else to talk about.  however, there have been times when i have wanted to defend my position to the death.  obviously there have been times when it isn't worth it, i put my position aside and just let it go.

i feel like i find myself  in situations of misunderstanding frequently.  i do my best to express myself clearly on the first go around to avoid misunderstandings, but end up clarifying more often than i'd like.  is this really because i am not expressing myself clearly or is it because the person receiving my message already has an expectation that i am not aware of and is interrupting my words differently than what i am meaning?

i guess none of this really matters because misunderstandings aren't going anywhere, they are as constant as the sun sets and rises each day.