deja vu or...

there aren't too many scenarios on this planet that someone else hasn't already or will experience.  it could be as crazy as being held at gunpoint, as funny as falling in a department store or as boring as using your crockpot three days in a row.  chances are someone has done nearly the exact same thing.

to me this is the best thing about sharing our personal experiences, we realize we are not alone in our endeavors.  talking about our set backs can ease the sting, consequently talking about our leaps forward can heighten the elation.  the trick is to be brave and share.  to own our lives in a way that is transparent.

this brings me to a text conversation i was having a bit ago:

sometimes i think i'm going to have to wait until my children are grown to be able to really find, develop and settle in to the relationship i desire, but that seems so far away.  i have to believe it is possible to achieve sooner.

finding a balance to satisfy my personal needs without compromising my duties as a mother is something that i have not been able to figure out.  i honestly don't think i am the only woman who feels this way.  i don't even think this is something single mother's deal with.  i think a large number of mother's struggle with how to find that perfect balance so you don't lose yourself to motherhood.

i've often wondered if fathers have the same struggles.  do they stress over balancing being the breadwinner, (yes, i am generalizing, but the majority of men bring home bigger paychecks than women do, check out the stats), being an engaged daddy, still being the macho guys guy and being an attentive husband?  hmmm?

interestingly this very conversation i was having with a friend, came up on a blog i frequently read.  the post was about the author, a man, who broke up with his girlfriend because his duties as a father required that he put all his attention there.  if you have the time follow the link and go read his post, he is a way better writer than i am and it's from man's perspective.

whoa!  how many times have you read an article, or clicked on someones facebook post, or seen an episode of a show, or hear a story on the radio and said, "hey that could've been me?"  this actually happens to me all the time, it is almost like having a deja vu moment.  when this does happen, i really tune in and compare the similarities and disparities.  sometimes i come away thinking, boy i'm glad my situation didn't end that way!, and other times i think, i should meet that human we would have a ton to talk about!. 

anyway, my point to all of this has nothing to do with finding balance, it is about the fact that we are united in the fact that we share experiences that are similar to others.  the others may be perfect strangers, a family member or a best friend, but our commonality is our experiences.