Monday, June 30, 2014

up in flames...

just last week i had said nothing exciting has been happening in my life.  i'm not sure if my mishap this morning really qualifies as "exciting", but it was definitely something.  for those of you who know me pretty well, you know i have an irrational fear of fires.  well, today marks my first experience with being on fire! exciting or sheer horror?  let's get on with the story and find out, shall we?

my summer schedule allows me to sleep in and enjoy a very leisurely morning prior to work.  with all my extra time i can actually iron my clothes, with my badass rowenta iron, instead of fluffing them in the dryer.  i even have time to get fancy with my hair; curl it or pull it up, only to get pissed off that it isn't working and wear it straight down like i normally do.  this morning i decided to iron my jacket and curl my hair.  however, the universe had a completely different idea for me.

my morning cup of joe tasted perfect.  shower went off without a hitch; no razor nicks or soap in my eye.  i had a plan for my outfit, which generally takes me a long time to figure out.  my make up went on smoothly and i was feeling fab about my morning so far.  got my locks blown out and instead of plugging in my flat iron and rocking the silky smooth mane, i plugged in my 2 1/2 inch barrel curling iron to try my hand at loose playful curls.

before i go on with the curling iron stuff, i should set the scene of my bathroom. you may remember from my previous story, my bathroom also houses my laundering machines, my cat's stuff, a toilet and a sink, oh and that nasty scale is in there too.  i set up my ironing board in front of the washer and dryer.  my jacket is draped over the ironing board and the iron is heating up at the other end of the ironing board.  i'm standing in front of my sink, because that is where the mirror is with my hair sectioned off, ready to start curling.

i grab my first chunk of hair, wind it up in the iron, let it sit for a moment then release.  ah yes, the hair is curling nicely, i think my hair might actually work out today.  i work my way around the back of my head and everything is still going swell.  i come the last chunk of hair and this is where my mishap takes place.

i grab the last chunk, bring the iron up to my hair and hear a pop.  i look to where the noise came from, which is towards the outlet my two irons are plugged in and notice that the sleeve of my robe is on fire!  from my wrist to my elbow i'm up in flames.

remember stop, drop and roll?  well that doesn't even enter my mind.  i throw my curling iron across the room towards the dryer and start flapping my arm up and down like i'm learning how to use wings for the first time.  in addition to frantically flapping my arm around, i am trying like hell to get out of my robe. usually i play this game with my robe on how long it will stay tied so i don't end up flashing myself in the mirror, but at this moment the tie seemed to be cemented closed, i was tugging and pulling, but it wasn't budging.

turns out i didn't need to remove my robe.  the frantic flapping of my arm did the trick and i successfully put out the fire.  i have no idea how my sleeve caught on fire, i didn't see that happen, just heard the pop.  my ugly pink robe now has one  black sleeve and smells terrible.  guess i will need a new one.

if i'm going to be honest, starting my monday with a fire was a little more excitement than i really needed.  to make my monday even better, i never got my jacket ironed which meant plan b for my outfit.  and i ended up with straight hair because i didn't trust my curling iron. happy monday y'all.


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